As a dating coach, at least half of the emails I get from women over 40 are about the same question you’ve probably been asking since you were a teenager: “Does he like me?”
Often the answer is either, “If you have to ask, probably not,” or ” There’s no way to know. Give him time.”
So many of us start to stress about whether or not a guy is into us way too soon. After the first date, especially if we feel a connection, we’re wondering if he saw the same thing we did.
But most men are different than we are. Big surprise, right? They’re pretty good at staying in the information gathering stage until they see enough evidence that you might be “The One.”
That doesn’t mean they don’t make decisions soon. They do, but the decision is usually that he likes you and wants to see you again. Simple as that.
What do we do? We decide we like him, but then start listing all the things that might make him a great boyfriend or husband. We replay the date in our heads. We second guess ourselves. Then we make the jump to trying to figure out what he thought and was going to do next.
Rumination is a female art. It’s kinda how our brains work. So when you start going down the rabbit hole, hold tight and try to stay in discovery mode. Keep gathering information. It may turn out you don’t even care if he’s into you.
Here’s the good news: when he IS in to you, you will know it. This is especially true of men dating over 40. Real grownup men don’t play games. When they’re in, they’re all in.
Here are 4 surefire signs he definitely likes you:
1. He keeps showing up.
He calls, texts, emails, and keeps asking you out. He’s on time or he calls if he’s a little late. These are all good signs! Remember though, he has a life. At the beginning, give him a little time between contacts if he needs it. But once he has you on his “maybe she’s a keeper” radar, you won’t be able to get rid of him.